So I haven’t updated really what’s going on since our last failed IVF cycle.
Saw the Dr and he recommended either trying another cycle while adding growth hormone to the mix, considering donor eggs or 🙏 for a natural miracle.
He said basically two reasons an embryo doesn’t implant 1. The uterus lining wasn’t good enough (but we know I scored 9/10 on my Matris so that wasn’t an issue for me) or 2. The embryo wasn’t as good as they thought it was based on how it appeared microscopically on day 5. Meaning it looked good day 5 but somewhere btwn then and implantation it stopped developing.
After this appointment we saught out a 2nd opinion (just to be safe & feel 100% confident) just to see someone elses thoughts & she was lovely, smart and straight to the point. She is quite concerned with our continued poor embryo development not getting past day 3 of growth as thats where we lose majority of our fertilized embryos and that it may be more than just poor egg quality. She is worried that there may be a genetic issue causing the embryos to be unable to develop and continue their growth (which would also explain why both our day 5 embryos didn’t implant and failed also).
This came as quite a shock to me as never was brought up to us before and I even asked about this after the 1st failed cycle to my doctor. Basically, she said if there is a genetic component then biological is no longer feasible. There is nothing that can be done to fix/cure a genetic abnormality or chromosomal deficiency. If my eggs have the genetic condition then we would have to consider donor eggs or other options or potentially a childless life. If its Mike’s sperm then same thing (but shes 99% sure it’s not him). She also is running some specific autoimmue tests since I have CFS as she said not uncommon for ppl with autoimmune issues for their bodies to attack their ovaries which could also explain my low ovarian reserve. We’ve been running on assumption I was just born with a low egg reserve.
So to say I’m terrified that our dream of having a biological child from both parents could possibly be over is an understatement. I can hardly breath just thinking about it. I have anxiety that my body is going to fail me…again.
We go tomorrow to the hospital in Toronto for the testing…on my birthday of all days. Then the agonizing 8 week wait for the results & follow up appointment.
So no decisions or treatments can be made now until we know. We are officially back in limbo and I HATE it.
I’m feeling sad & sorry for myself & my hubby. I want to be able to do something or fix this but there’s nothing I can do to change these results. They will either be positive or negative. For the first time in this infertility journey…im praying for a negative.
Please keep us in your prayers! 🙏😬🤞
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